.Saturday, April 26, 2008 ' Y
is teaching your child the rights = physical discipline?!
sometimes how i wish i wasnt born to this family.
life here is tough. you have to be a total perfectionist.
i aint perfect. neither can i be perfect!
i just want to lead life the way i want.
results have to be perfect!
and the thing is... i aint capable of doing that!
i've been trying to study hard
just to make sure i do well for tests and exams.
they just dun see it.
they think im just putting up a show.
a show that will portray myself as a 'guai' daughter.
i hate it!! i dun wanna be look at this way.
i also want to have good results.
not very good. but a passing result.
who wont want that. right?
i just dont know why they dont understand me?
am i so difficult to be understand?
the thought of being discipline physically SUCKS!!
i am 16, coming 17.
and still using this kind of disciplinary system on me.
im no longer the little girl at the age of 9,
who dont know the rights and wrongs.
i am who i am now!!
even if im wrong, i dun deserve being discipline like that!
no1. embarrassment
no2. its totally not the right way
no3. it injures me
no4. it tires you out by whacking nonstop.
what for? save that energy!
i know that im wrong. i apologied.
not accepted...
everyone makes mistakes.
78% of them will somehow make the same kind of mistakes over n over again.
well... sad to say, i belongs to the 78%!!
i dun like this family.
i dun like the bring up here.
life here is pressurising.
i want to lead a normal and simple life,
like how others get to live.
who the hell care if my parents are rich?
i dont!! i dont like it when they are rich.
they see judge everything by a person's family background.
thats you!!
i am not like that.
but being your child, people see as the way i see you.
so what if you are rich?
do you have the right to ask favour of someone?
eg1. asking your frens to fetch you, when u have a car.
eg2. getting me to ask my frens to do me favours.
eg3. thinks that everything you say are right.
eg4. have the right to blow your top at waiters.
etc etc...
i am not like you!!
i dun get my frens to be my servants and slaves.
they are my frens who i wanna share my life with.
but my life isnt nice to be shared with.
sorry. but i really dun like you!
i wish i can run away from home.
i wish that i can be dead this minute.
i wanna run. i wanna kill. but...
the guts aint here with me.
im always wrong, and you're always right.
forever. this way. no change. FINE!
you guys think you're so smart at judging ppl.
well... you FAILED!!
they said: michele is not a very good girl. she is a bad influence.
i said: michele is my life time fren. without her, i will die! she is the best of the best. she's the best soulmate! she gives me encourages and supports. so what if she's crooked? so what if she goes clubbing? the law dint say anything about being crooked and gg clubbing!
they said: adeline chow is a bung! dun mix around with her too much.
i said: bung so what?! bungs are still human! bungs are still girls afterall. i dun feel anything wrong when being with her. she's a nice fren for 5 years. if you're so against bungs, one fine day i'll turn crooked for you to see.
STOP JUDGING MY FRENS!! YOU DUN WANT FRENS. BUT I WANT! I NEED FRENS BECAUSE I DUN HAVE YOU! HAVING YOU = NOT HAVING YOU!! and if yu dint realise, yur frens are so not real!! they only look for you when they need help. your love comes and goes. to gain your love, it comes with a price. and the price is... not to lie, not to bluff, not to fail, not to disobey. sorry! this love is too expensive. i cant afford such parental love. look for someone else to be you daughter or son! maybe you can sell your love to them much easier. you have given me physical discipline since primary 1. not working! you can disown me. all the better. but dont do any physical harm on me. i hate it!
my friends have all seen the canning marks on me. whether is it feather duster or using a chair and crashing it onto me. they've seen those injuries. trust me. one fine day, i might sue you for child abuse. parents dun have the right to be abusive. oh! i forgot, you dun mind. cos you said you have the right to discipline me physically!! so you said, nothing will happen. you even said that even if you will have to kill me, its still NOT an offence. hmm... then go ahead!! i wanna die too. so why not kill me, since its not an offence. at the same time, let me die and get out of your vision. like you said, having me = not having me! how you wish you dint have a daughter like me. kill me, i die, the government have one less citizen to care for. and you can save money and spent on yourselves. one less person in the house to support. and the one less person is the one who's expenses is very high!! good idea!...
or shall i try killing myself for you?
im sorry to some friends for my parents are being so judgemental. its not that i want it to happen. but because its my parents, so it has to happen!!
11:38 PM
.Friday, April 25, 2008 ' Y
today we had english paper! paper one i think is screwed. haha. paper two still alright. managable. after paper, went to tp to buy bubble tea! (: im in love. that person working there... omg!!! hot hot hot!! shut up eileen.
ok ok... and as i was saying, mich came over to my house to study! we studied bio. next paper is bio n ss on the same day. next wednesday that is. faint la. i think everything is going to be damn screwed. we studied and watch youtube at the same time. haha... oppx!
mich added jonic on friendster. haha. she viewed her friendster and thinks that jonic is not bad looking and looks hot in some pictures. haha. ahem!! girl, you're attach (: leave it for me! haha. den we were camwhoring. woohoo~ not enough, so we decided to continue tomorrow when in school! wtf!! haha. ppl go school study, we go school to camwhore. haha. mental nut cases =D
10:58 AM
.Tuesday, April 22, 2008 ' Y
finally got the pictures from michele!! so small! her camera resolution got problem!! tomorrow there's chinese listening comprehension. good luck to me!
me & mich <3
us!! (:
me, mich & xinyi!
live is meaningless without her!
12:05 PM
.Monday, April 21, 2008 ' Y
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO SINYING
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
!!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ADELINE(CHOW)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
!!!
4:05 AM
.Sunday, April 20, 2008 ' Y
preparing for fantasia 7. had a hard time searching for clothes. one was super femine. the other has a little of the bung kind of dressing. but my face DONT look like a bung. im straight!!!!!!! (:
yesterday evening, i was watching 100% entertainment half way and xinyi msg me. she said she was leaving house already. so i had to stop watching tv and get going too. met her at j8 for a quick and simple dinner. headed to get seiriol and daphne their flowers. its pretty! (: den we rushed down to mich's house. met minghui at mich's house too. together we cabbed down to cjc.
o.O so many people there. ij-ians, their boyfriends, girlfriends, brothers, sisters, papa, mama, practically the whole family. haha. all there to watch chij fantasia 7! some cjc students who were walking out were wondering like wad the hell are we people doing there at their school. we met nicole, eleanor, wing, mandy, bel, shiming, zu, aisha, blah blah blah!!... so many people lurh.
the concert was not bad. the conductor was damn funny. he kept on bouncing when conducting. mich said that he was suffering from spasm. haha. then joanna teo sang 3 chinese old songs. i personally prefer the third song she sang. it was slightly upbeat. hah. the second song, she made the entry with a very high, sharp and peircing voice, which made our hair all stand. eeeks.
after concert, all of us, one big group, took a bus down to thomson for supper. prata house!!! yum yum. i was dead hungry lurh. but i only had one, but big cheese prata. woohooo~
more photos will be uploaded, once mich email them to me (=
5:15 AM
.Friday, April 18, 2008 ' Y
16TH MAY 2008, CHIJ SECONDARY (TOA PAYOH) WILL BE HAVING AN 'IJ FIESTA'!!!
ANYBODY INTERESTED?? CAN LOOK FOR ME TO PURCHASE THE COUPONS (:
tomorrow night will be going for my school's band concert with xinyi, eleanor, nicole, minghui, belnice, winglam!! justina will be there too. but different group! but we'll meet after the concert for supper. the concert is like an annual thing! so its rather a big thing in my school. cos band always get gold for syf performance. haha. go support seriol!! haha
not sure of wad to wear. everyone wearing dress la. so i will either wear a long tee with pants or this dress, which looks more like a coat (:
the coat looking dress. haha!!!!
9:38 AM
. ' Y
yesterday afternoon, after school, mummy called me! asked if i will be free at night. of course i am! so she said we'll go have dinner with sinying and aunty. since my daddy, her daddy not around. it was meant to be a dinner for her 18th birthday, which will be this coming sunday!! so mich and i went tp to look for present!! it was so last minute. so took quite a while to hunt for nice and presentable present.
we walked past this shop which sells not bad looking shirts. reasonably priced too. so i got her 2 shirts from there. the shirts are so cute lurh!! i like the shirts too. but nehmind, use the money for her present is more important. haha. came home. super late already la. so skipped lunch. damn hungry. did abit of my homework and revision. den went to shower and get myself all dressed up nice nice :)
we went to dempsy for dinner. wanted to go to Prime Society for steak. but in the end, we decided to go Oosh! its like a european and japanese restraunt. its freaking expensive, but mummy said its only because of sinying. cos its her birthday!! wah... but the food there was nice. we had japanese food.
after that walked t the outdoor bar, which apparently belongs to Oosh too. we went for some drinks! and i meant... drinks with alcohol!! yumyum. i order the Oosh-special (: come to Oosh of cos must order their speciality. right?? its vodka with lime and soda. the place was nice. and... there was this waiter who look...oooooOOOO hahaha!! not bad sehhh...crazy!! LOLx
forgot to mention that perfect 10 came to my school for our assembly too. with the nokia bus and 2 spore rock bands. the first one was...not nice! the second one was... hot hot hot!! especially the lead singer. gosh, he's so hot with a good voice (:
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nice bar table!!
that guy in the white shirt, the waiter!! (:
my cocktail with...the raisin bread! haha
cheeerrrrs!!! =D
left: sinying, right: mine!
nice atmosphere right??
9:26 AM
.Tuesday, April 8, 2008 ' Y
GLUTTONS IN ACTION!! apparently michele and i have not eaten for a week, at least! look at how full our plates was piled up with pasta!? shit!! another 2kg in my body. thanks to michele. she was the one who served. and it was all minghui's fault for not coming today. we had to eat her share as well. idiot!! pasta + cereal prawns!! yummy-licious (:
anyway... michele left early today. because she's suppose to meet up with calvin and aj. humph!! we were doing geography and watching youtube at the same time. shhhh (:
today our class broke record. finally, after 3 years, we had full attendance! and its not valentine's day. mrs khoo must be so so so so happy!!!
signing off~ bye bye. oh yay!! andrew is back from london. finally!! (:
9:53 AM
.Monday, April 7, 2008 ' Y
yayness! i finally get to see clement online this morning. kinda spoke to him for awhile but he's busy, so i dint dare to talk much with him. awww. sad i know! clement clement clement!! 花吃病又犯了! haha. dint manage to get caleb's msn for justina and icaru's msn for myself never mind, will get to see him online again. teehee.
went for chinese tuition with justina! met her downstairs the community centre first then went up together. its our first lesson. but tuition was funny la. the teacher was like a joker and he likes to talk cock. but i think its worth going for the tuition. i hope i'll benefit from it! :)
after tuition walked over to the market and justina treated me with sugarcane drink! thanks justii!! :) then she accompanied me to wait for my mom to pick me up. and it started to rain. so she had no choice but to call her mom to pick her up too. but... i left first! haha.
为你写诗
爱情是一种怪事, 我开始全身不受控制
爱情是一种本事, 我开始连自己都不是
为你我做了太多的傻事, 第一件就是为你写诗
为你写诗 为你静止, 为你做不可能的事
为你我学会弹琴写词, 为你失去理智
为你写诗 为你静止, 为你做不可能的事
为你弹奏所有情歌的句子, 我忘了说最美的是你的名字
爱情是一种怪事, 你的笑容是唯一宗旨
爱情是一种本事, 我在你心里什么位置
为你我做了太多的傻事, 第一件就是为你写诗
为你写诗 为你静止, 为你做不可能的事
为你我学会弹琴写词, 为你失去理智
为你写诗 为你静止, 为你做不可能的事
为你弹奏所有情歌的句子, 我忘了说最美的是你的名字
为你写诗 为你静止, 为你做不可能的事
为你我学会弹琴写词, 为你失去理智
为你写诗 为你静止, 为你做不可能的事
为你弹奏所有情歌的句子, 我忘了说最美的是你的名字
我什么都能忘记但唯一不忘的是你的名字
我什么都能忘记但唯一不忘的是你的样子
我什么都能忘记但唯一不忘的是你的名字
我什么都能忘记但唯一不忘的是你的样子
11:23 AM
.Saturday, April 5, 2008 ' Y
hey there people!!
justina was asking me why i only blogged about clement and icaru yesterday night! well...thats because im only fond and love them! so she said that i should be blogging about her beloved, caleb chow! so here i am today to help her blog a little on her behalf regarding... caleb! better be nice to me! (:
wad to blog about caleb? okayy... he's this 18year old boy. who is rather small size, compared to the rest of the guys, including clement and icaru. teehee. or should i say... caleb is rather small build. his skin is quite fair to an extend and he looks very japanese. i would give him a 6.5 out of a score of 10 for that!! (: however... no muscles leh! then he doesnt look very manly. but he got this charm in him which i dunno how to describe. this charm has infact helped him to attract many girls la, including justina!! (: wanna see how caleb look like? in case you guys dun believe my description! presenting you.... CALEB CHOW LIN YU!! (:
ok ok... enough of caleb. back to the topic about clement! (: oh but... i think caleb can be on my list la. just that clement and icaru will be first and second place and caleb will be....fifth? haha. oppx. ok!! i've this taggie on my tagboard from... a person called LEMON! obvious its clement. but i really do hope that its not some assholes coming to my blog and fake as him lurh!! also the link given is his current email address. hmm... o wells, but really wish and pray that its the REAL clement tsang!! hahh... i LOVE clement!!!!!!! wahahahahaha!! is he attach? hope not... dun crash my hopes and dreamsss... tell me he's not! tell me you're not!! (:
can you believe it?! i actually signed up for chinese tuition with justina?! faints. i mean... our chinese standards are not bad... but this year, our standards have really dropped quite abit. its not just us, but the others too ): tuition starts this sunday evening!! see you my dear justii (:
haha!! i blogged about caleb already! happy already? lolx. dun forget to help me ask clement for icaru's msn if u see him online. cos i doubt i'll get a chance to see him online. TEEHEE (:
9:47 AM
.Friday, April 4, 2008 ' Y
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO DARIUS
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
!!!
dear lao gong!! :)
here's wishing you a very happy 18th birthday. its one BIG birthday. you've gotta make it big and grand and known to everyone. yea? and... sorry ar. your present... its...erm...on the way!! hopefully by end of next week. i dun wanna give angbao!! cos i aint OFFICIALLY married. and its so UNSINCERE!! i think i should at least get you a something which i think its practical and useful. more sincere!!
eh eh eh!! i aint trying to say the rest who give you angbao not sincere. but thats just what i feel. enjoy your birthday. happy drinking!! finally you can drink and puff LEGALLY (:
teehee :) enjoy lurh!!
love you loads
ps. for EVERYONE's infomation, i now declare that darius wong is NOT my real husband. it just so happen because we were playing and jokng around. there is NOTHING going on between the both of us! :) thank you so much for your kind understanding!! :)
3:00 PM
.Thursday, April 3, 2008 ' Y
right!! (dont tell me left or wrong)
im still thinking of what to get darius for birthday! his birthday is like tmr. he'll be celebrating it from tonight all the way till tmr! 18th birthday. must be grand and must be made known to everyone. hahaha. kidding! i suppose i'll have to give him a be-lated present. im sorry! minghui too :( paiseh ar. im really very broke now... have been paying for mich's meals recently.
today im so damn tired! okayy, like which day am i not? but today is really an exception. the weather is fcking hot the whole morning and noon. making me feel so off. my eyes were like shutting during maths lesson! but... its mrs khoo! cant sleep. she'll probably hae my head off. so too bad lor.
my stomach ache is also killing me. its a killer! there's something really wrong with it. once in awhile it will be a sharp pain. sometimes the pain is unbearable. and again, its just pain, yet i cant sit up straight! wad is this? haiz... i think im going to die soon. i mean... this pain comes in almost everyday. or just for the few minutes every one hour. why not just kill me. stab me and make me die. so i wont get to feel this stupid pain anymore! forever!! :(
i think im in love!! L-O-V-E :) with... clement tsang & icaru from... you are the one!! woohoo :) icaru too old for me though. however... clement is only 2 years older!! :) perfect!! nanyang poly kid. wonder if my cousin will know him. hahaha. show you their picture!!! lalalalalala. oppx. really sorry. this pictures are taken from clement's blog. haha. erm, actually louis is not bad too la. but no photo of him. sorry! :)
icaru (left) & clement (right)
CLEMENT :)
8:30 PM
. ' Y
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MINGHUI
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
!!!
Hmm... another birthday girl! i owe minghui a present. shit!! and... what am i going to get for darius, my husband? omg!!! im broke already. even before i could get them anything :( im sad. my angbao money is missing. hello?? did anyone stole it from me? im sad and depressed. humph.
i gladly and happily and loudly wished minghui happy birthday this morning in school when i saw her. she was like... far from me. den i shouted. everyone looked at me. malu! but its for minghui (: awww... arent you touched? every 5 minutes i was wishing her. until she said "you wish me one more time, i wont say thank you!" haha. fine lorr...
michele dint come school. argh! we had a changed in seating arrangements. i so hate my new seat. its like in the middle of no where. well, that's at least what i feel about my seat la.
shall stop blabbering. im super tired!! not feeling well. if not soon, nonsense will be seen being typed out here!
TEEHEE :)
8:34 AM
.Wednesday, April 2, 2008 ' Y
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO CHRIS
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
!!!
(HAPPY BLUFFDAY)
HAPPY APRIL'S FOOL (:
chris will be throwing a party at downtown east! hope she'll enjoy herself lurh. she told me and kind of promis that she wont get herself drunk. and i doubt she'll dare to la. cos her parents will be there (: best wishes to you. may your dreams come true. forget your pains and start anew! teehee. and... STOP BEING CHILDISH AND LAME !! (: right... and having 50 people at that small little chalet. i take my hats off you. haha.
9:34 AM
